Embrace Vim: it is my re-entry into programming and writing.
I’m glad I captured that thought. I just bought a copy of Roget’s Thesaurus and read the preface and introduction. My bookshelf is now empty, save for this, a text on RISC processors, and a text on assembly language. Over the years I’ve gone from wall to wall, floor to ceiling bookshelves filled with over 1000 books to a small, portable shelf with approximately 30. I then forced myself to whittle it down by two: half I donated, the other I kept. Of those remaining I put all but these three into another room.
Perhaps my problem with choosing is, in part, due a false assumption that a true choice is singular, discrete and decisive. We think of choice as binary, a parting of the ways, embracing this and rejecting that. If this is true then it makes sense to fear it: choice means rejecting things that are important, aspects of experience and reality. And I suppose there’s a sense in which this is true, as we can never know as much as we like, let alone everything. But overall it’s a myth. Behind, at the supposed moment of, and after choice lie countless others not simply connected to but defining it. There is no singular choice, rather networks of them, of various degrees of importance. What I am trying to do now is narrow my focus to a few areas I can explore deeper. I’d like to both make a career out of them and simply enjoy them. I used to do this with theology and philosophy, but it is time to find a new path.
I realized last night that Insolubilia is 4 years old. I spent some time rereading some of the first posts, and was surprised how good they were. I feel like I always see my present self as preparing to do something well, if only I can have enough time to prepare, which I never do. As such, anything I produce is (in my mind) a draft at best, not worthy of higher praise. And if that’s the case, how much more so my past work, which must surely be both immature and embarrassing? Now, to be sure, much of it is. Nevertheless I’m glad I wrote it. It is always good to remind ourselves of what we believed.